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So September 29th is upon me again, 24th time by my reckoning. This every increasing number is bringing with it many unwelcome bodily changes. Aches and pains are at an all time high, whereas hair follicles and tadpole counts are at an all time low! What I needed to alleviate this grimness was some kind of immature outing that could get the red blood in this males pumping again. What was delivered was Weekend at Dave’s.

I was told my some of my mates that something had been planned and that I needed to bring myself and at least £100 to Potters Bar stations at 8:30am on Saturday. Not the best start in my opinion but I put my trust into my comrades and did what was asked. We trapesed across London on a public transport system that was running at half mast and on a route which had to be kept at arm’s length from your truly at all times. The chaps did very well though. I had absolutely no idea what where we were headed, although maybe this wasn’t so difficult as I don’t think they did either. Then we were there. Where was there? The ExCeL arena, in the London docklands. Fosters and Nuts magazine had put in a Maxpower esque style party and it was all in my honour (in my head anyway). There were women, beer, cars, football, poker, go karting and plenty of other inflatable fun. Dave looked out on his weekend and saw it was good.

We entered the building and proceeded to the security check in, a common enough procedure these days, but as we soon realised these were no ordinary security guards. Young ladies in scantily clad uniforms who were very “hands on�?. Mr Kelly commented upon having his front-bottom touched in the first time since our old headmaster “checked him in�?. So the kids were in their candy store. So much to see and do. Gorgeous women you might go weeks without seeing once were dotted all over the shop. And they were all being paid to be nice to us!

One of the main attractions of the day was a show put on by those well known, Jordan wannabe glamour girls. It consisted of an assortment of prancing around and lame interviews but business certainly picked up when three birthday boys, including me were called up on stage to make fools of themselves. Thankfully I wasn’t made to do anything too embarrassing but I did have to put my verbal manhood on show for 500+ heckling men to assess, giving our best chat up lines to some blonde stunners. After some false starts I manage to squeeze out

Do you come here often?

Which not for the last time that day earned me a good whipping.

So all in all a great day out and a big thank you to everyone who made it happen.

Pictures

• Velcro
• Birds
• Show
• Going home

This entry was posted on Sunday, October 2nd, 2005 at 1:21 pm by Hopkins and is filed under Birthdays. Comments are currently closed.